Why the bleep isn’t my dress here yet? As previously mentioned, the lovely Adriana sent it out ages ago. And according to the USPS package tracker (which I may have checked, oh I don’t know, about 1,000 times this week) here is the status:

There are a few weird things about this:

#1- Why did it take 5 days for my dress to get from Miami to Auckland? I mean I’m assuming it went “por avion” because a boat definitely would need to depart from a west coast port, not Miami. Unless of course they went the scenic route. And in that case, kudos to that ship captain for hauling butt and circumnavigating the globe in 5 days. But honestly 5 days to fly to New Zealand?

#2- What reason could there be for my dress to have to enter customs twice? A long history of wedding dress drug trafficking? Oh, I guess so. Fair enough. Check it twice. http://www.defimedia.info/articles/2659/1/Wedding-dress-lingerie-hide-drug-parcels/Page1.html

#3- Even if you do need to be extra careful to ward off drunk trafficking bride-zillas, how long could it possibly take for a dress to get through customs? They’ve had it for NINE days!

I’m freaking out here! Of course there’s absolutely no reason for me to freak out, I have tons of time to do alterations, and I could actually call customs to see what’s up. But all the same, the anticipation and waiting is driving me nuts.